It was on a sunny Autumn day
A band o’Witchers came out to play
Or should I say to find some mutants
Scary as they go
Led by Vester of Oxenfurt
And Jodok of Kovir, prepared for the hunt
Armed with potions and signs and swords
But not prepared for the foe

With needles and eyes and needles and eyes and needles and eyes
needles and eyes and needles and eyes – a monster – I must say
With needles and eyes and needles and eyes and needles and eyes and needles and eyes
To tell you the truth I’m really surprised they didn’t run away!

There was Velda and Korvi and Baldwin of Bruug
And Anselm and Lanzo and Wilfred, that thug
And dark haired Dacre with a flaming torch
following the masters
They went through the woods, and, bloody shame
they couldn’t really find their game
Until they saw a giant tree
And heard the rustling bushes

With….

Well, is it a drowner, a mutant or ghoul
The adepts were wandering, while creature foul
Shook the bush in a menacing way
And made them really nervous
I don’t think this creature can be found
in “Jodok’s Book of Monster Sounds”
So, witchers, we have to improvise
With what we have at hand

With…

They soon prepared a blitz attack
A Grapeshot thrown by an expert hand
Exploded with a flash and whack
But still the bushes rustled
Then Jodok came in with the sign of AARD
(for you must know, it’s not unheard of
to use an AARD for anything
even cleaning your shoes)

With…

And after this heavy witcher assault
The bush went silent for a little while
But suddenly rustled again and again
And made them leap in fear
Vester came in with shaking hands
Parted the branches and set his eyes
Upon the foe, and then exclaimed
“Well, fuck me sideways! It’s just a bloody hedgehog!”

With needles and eyes and needles and eyes and needles and eyes and needles and eyes
No more beating around the bush and no more things to say
with needles and eyes and needles and eyes and needles and eyes and needles and eyes
They all got made by the prickly beast and the hedgehog got away

Piosenka napisana na podstawie wydarzeń z larpy Witcher School, międzynarodowej edycji z września 2016.

Tekst i muzyka Barbara Karlik CC-BY-SA.

Świat wiedźmina stworzył A. Sapkowski. Grę Wiedźmin stworzył CD Projekt RED. Vester, Jodok, Velda, Korvi, Baldwin, Anselm, Lanzo, Wilfred i Dacre są postaciami stworzonymi przez 5 Żywiołów oraz wcielających się w nich graczy.

Żaden jeż nie ucierpiał w wyniku przytoczonej historii.